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Cathage must be destroyed!
20 most recent entries

Date:2006-05-30 18:04
Subject:
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Recent t-shirt concepts.

(9 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2006-01-22 13:19
Subject:
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Self-portrait
pencil

(25 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-12-14 11:17
Subject:
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I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel of what I've produced recently. Here's another doodle I made, and the first watercolor I've ever done. I don't especially like the watercolor, I think it started with a bad drawing, but that's life. Now I'm going to have to start plugging away at making new art.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

(7 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-12-13 12:42
Subject:
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For my next screeprinting project, I've designed several white on black images at the request of my friend Victor.

The first image is a portrait of sci-fi author/psychedelic shut-in/Nixon hater Philip K. Dick. The line "the empire never ended" is repeated over and over in the book Valis, and sums up PKD's belief that the Roman empire still literally exists, changed only cosmetically, still just as oppressive as it was 2000 years ago.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Which is the more effective caption?


The second series of images is inspired by David Cronenberg's Marshall MacLuhan horror show, Videodrome, and the caption "long live the new flesh" is the most memorable line in the movie, and in most of the images I used a font that might have evoked a digital future back in 1983. The first face you see is star James Woods at his sleaziest, and the rest are Cronenberg's face.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


If you have any constructive criticism, please lay it on me. I want to get the images right before I start printing.

-Philip

(22 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-12-12 14:17
Subject:
Security:Public

This is a screenprinted t-shirt I made last week. This particular piece isn't my own drawing, it comes from illustrator Sam Weber's website. I chose this beautiful, elegant image to learn the screenprinting process, of which my friend Jess showed me the ropes.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Detail of the shirt



Thanks for showing me how to screen print, Jess!

-Philip

(17 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-12-11 18:06
Subject:
Security:Public

warpsmith is now my art blog, not a livejournal as I've used it in the past. Still no friendlist, but if you'd like to tune in and give me feedback, that would be swell. I plan on making and posting a new piece of art as much as once a day, and I'll try to establish some discipline in this way.

I think I'll start with a doodle I recently made.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com


-Philip

(17 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-10-23 14:00
Subject:
Security:Public

For reasons I don't want to explain here, I'm closing this livejournal. In the end, my participation in LJ has been more destructive than creative for me, and it's better to just stop altogether than to continue posting rare and impersonal entries. I'm deleting my friendlist rather than the journal itself, because I don't want to lose a few things I've made here that I am genuinely proud of. Please don't take the deletion personally, I just don't want the temptation to spend any more time on LJ reading my f-list.

If you know me personally, then you know how to reach me. Take care.

(68 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-10-07 16:26
Subject:
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If you rub Jesus on your head, your hair will stand up on end.

(10 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-09-12 18:29
Subject:
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I saw this driving home from work.

WHAT?!


~~~

This weekend I saw Broken Flowers, the new Jim Jarmusch/Bill Murray flick. Good movie, amazing ending. Amazing because it elicited loud howls of angry frustration from the audience, which was hoping for a satisfying, conventional wrap-up. Any film that can piss off its audience so badly is a winner in my book.





Date:2005-09-09 14:32
Subject:
Security:Public

Here's a follow-up to last week's LOOTING 2 THE X-TREME post.


Does anyone know where I can fence a baby?


Last week, I wrote the general manager of the news agency that published the story of the kid that saved 100 people with an abandoned schoolbus. Since then, the station has removed the story from their website. I don't know if it was because of angry mail they've received or if it's just their policy to remove week-old news from their site. Here's my letter:
This is regarding your story on Jabbor Gibson, the man who saved 100 people with an abandoned schoolbus.

I believe this was incredibly irresponsible reporting with a clearly racist bent. How could your station actually run a story of such evident heroism and call it "an extreme act of looting" in the very first paragraph? There were other instances of odious bias in the online story as well as the news clip, such as calling the passengers "renegades" and using the word "admitting" to describe Jabbor's statement, as if it were an "admission" of guilt. Also, your reporter describes the act as "stealing" the bus without so much as a standard "allegedly". I'm not a lawyer, but I'm fairly certain taking abandoned property is salvage, not theft.

This piece made my skin crawl, and everyone I have shown it to has had the same reaction. The media's portrayal of black people in this crisis is becoming a major issue, and upon reading this report, there is no question as to why.

Who submitted this piece? Jimmy Olson, Cub Reporter?

Predictably, the manager didn't respond. Oh well, I really wanted to hear what he had to say and, y'know, mock him for it.

(5 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-09-07 19:55
Subject:
Security:Public

Look what I found in my kitchen!

Seems that someone in my house OMG HATES AMERICA!
You know, aside from me. HAW!

!!!


ALSO: Sarasota friends, Do any of you have my copy of Hannah and her Sisters? It's gone missing, and I know I sometimes lend stuff out and forget about it. Anyone?





Date:2005-09-04 10:46
Subject:
Security:Public

Haha oh shit LOOTING 2 THE X-TREME!!!

So here's the story: An 18 year-old Nawlins kid jumps behind the wheel of an abandoned school bus and rescues 100 people, including an eight day-old newborn. Having never driven a bus before in his life, he gasses it for seven hours straight to the Houston Astrodome, whereupon the cops initially don't allow the victims entry because... wait for it... they're not "official"!


"I don't care if I get blamed for it, as long as I saved my people
...and this really sweet DVD player."


Oh man, I have never heard of such officious douchery in my entire life (probably not true). And now, get this, the kid, a bona fide hero, may be in trouble for stealing the bus!

WHAT.

Here is your moment of Media Absudity for the day: the article I learned this from called it "an act of EXTREME LOOTING." And the video newsclip calls the bus a "renegade" bus.

A renegade bus, people! Holy shit, that schoolbus is filled with Mad Max post-apocalyptic desperadoes in International Male Tough Guy leather trenchcoats! Maybe Lorenzo Lamas was on that bus in an extreme act of stubble!


...now he prowls the badlands, an outlaw hunting outlaws, a bounty hunter... a RENEGADE.

(28 Farts in the wind | Pull my finger)





Date:2005-09-02 07:44
Subject:
Security:Public

mcbrennan on American Reichstag and The Destruction of New Orleans.

I hate the cult of 9/11. All hail 9/11! The alpha and omega! The answer to every question, the ultimate Orwellian rhetorical smackdown. It justifies every injustice, excuses any crime, stifles any dissent. It was a horrible day, true. Seven, eight large buildings were partially or totally destroyed, 3000 people were brutally killed. The psychological shock was awful. Malevolent men used our collective shock and fear to turn not only our country but the whole damn world on its ear, protected from all criticism by the magic equation 9/11, chanted like a mantra by our jug-eared Cheerleader In Chief.

mcbrennan is great. You should friend her.

~~~

Before 9/11 the Federal Emergency Management Agency listed the three most likely catastrophic disasters facing America: a terrorist attack on New York, a major earthquake in San Francisco and a hurricane strike on New Orleans.

So yeah. If when you hear the administration say that no one could have predicted this, you will know that they are positively erupting with geysers of horseshit.

~~~

Every Thursday, I drop off the small deposit from my library at Wachovia Bank, and I stand at the teller's booth, staring at two round stickers on the glass: the first is a silhouetted picture of the New York skyline with a caption that reads "September 11, Patriotism Day". The second sticker is a glowingly-lit, mouse-eye underview of a stoic bald eagle against the backdrop of the American flag. That one reads "9-11-2001: We Remember".

I swear, it is such a surge of unreality I feel every Thursday, standing at that teller's desk, picking at those stickers a little with my fingernail. I always thought that unreality was irrational, but looking at it now I think it makes total sense.

A sense of the absurd is the only way to cope.

!!!

The alarm radio just now went off, and I am listening to the DJs give away tanks of gas as call-in prizes. The Florida Attorney General got on the air with the disc jockeys to gush about how great the radio station is for giving away gasoline, and the knucklehead DJ replied that he was doing "God's work".

Uh huh. I've been saying for awhile that it's time to get a bicycle, but now I'm definitely getting one.





Date:2005-06-27 23:46
Subject:
Security:Public

BRAINSSSS

Zombie Phil want BRAINS!

...also wants zombie dog minions.





Date:2005-06-25 16:32
Subject:I have the latest trend for you, Faith Popcorn.
Security:Public

Faith Popcorn is the Nostradamus of Trends and the Oracle of Marketing! She has predicted Jesus Barbie and "foodaceuticals". WE HAVE WRITTEN HER A LETTER.

Dear Faith Popcorn,

I have seen the future, and it is WRAPAROUND SUNGLASSES. I live in sunny Sarasota Florida, and let me tell you, IT IS VERY BRIGHT HERE. Now you might ask yourself "why aren't regular old Ray Bans good enough? Huh?" Well, you have to understand that the sun gets into your eyes from the sides, and it suck-diddly-ucks! I have seen the old people wearing theses amazing contraptions on their heads for a long time, and it has yet to make it really REALLY huge with the youngsters. But I feel that this is about to change, considering that their is an enourmous* hole in the sky RIGHT OVER THE FREAKING ARCTIC. I'd attach a bar graph, but I'm sure that you are already aware of this environmental "TREND"!!!! HAW!

In any case, Faith, soon it's going to be extra bright, and we'll all want to protect our valuable cones and rods. This is going to be fabulous. I'd like to market these specialty sunglasses to the youth market, and I was hopinf that you'd consider bankrolling my project, and possibly working into your corporate consulting and oracular business seminars.

What do you think, ay?

Love,
Philip & Kelli.







*All spelling and grammatical errors are intentional to up the crazy quotient.





Date:2005-06-13 18:07
Subject:
Security:Public

Who's Michael Jackson?

P.S.





Date:2005-06-09 19:44
Subject:
Security:Public

Sarasota residents!

The Brownstone Cafe is in danger of shutting down! It is one of the only watering holes in this city that is youth-friendly in a town otherwise overtly hostile to anyone that isn't fossilized and entombed in their Mercedes. It is a welcoming, friendly place that has played host to many music and art shows, and has always provided a pleasant meeting ground.

Sadly, the owner and soft-spoken barkeep, Earl, passed away last month, finally succumbing to brain cancer after a long battle. Earl is survived by a wife and two small children. This also leaves The Brownstone rudderless. Apparently, a group of businessmen are interested in purchasing The Brownstone and leaving it open, and in the interest of this happening, my friend Adam has started a petition to show these businessmen that there IS an interest in keeping the doors open.

Please, if you value The Brownstone Cafe, sign the petition and show your support in any way you can! Mention this in your own journal!





Date:2005-05-26 00:27
Subject:Strange News from the Intarwebs.
Security:Public

OH MY GOD. WHAT THE FUCK. BARBECUE.

Sylvester Stallone is directing a movie about the life of Edgar Allan Poe, from his own script. Not starring, though. GOD DAMN IT. I hope he follows it up with a self-penned Woody Allen biopic. Could anything possibly be better?




Also: Digable Planets* have reunited and are touring. Could I be any more excited? Reachin' (A New Refutation of Time and Space) was one of the best albums of the 90s, and probably the most played CD in my collection. After dropping one more album, they just vanished, at the height of their powers. For them to reappear after so long is like JD Salinger releasing a new book.

They're playing House of Blues on June 30. Anybody interested in going with me?



*Their only radio hit was the jazzy Rebirth of Slick (Cool Like Dat), but I'm telling you, the whole album is astonishingly great.





Date:2005-05-16 00:33
Subject:
Security:Public

Today I got scammed by a traffic cop. I am absolutely certain it was a scam.

NOT HAPPY WITH COPS RIGHT NOW.Collapse )

So how do I fight this guy in court? Is there any way I can get some evidence, like dispatch records (which might tell me whether or not there actually was an incident that the k-9 cop was rushing towards), to help my case? I mean, I'd probably be taking a big risk going to a judge and telling him that I think the cops are scamming people to fill ticket quotas. What do I do?

Are there cheap lawyers that handle cases like these? Should I just bend over and take it?





Date:2005-05-11 17:14
Subject:
Security:Public

burkean, take a look at what just came out!



It was evening here, But upon earth the very noon of night.Collapse )




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